Saturday, March 03, 2007


Orange: I'm not quite certain if this journal quilt is totally finished but will try to squeeze it in yet for artwords whose theme for this week has been poetry. Though some of the words to "what a wonderful world" are on the quilt I was spending a lot of time thinking about the poem I wrote called "Orange" as I was making it.
The photos are of my Dad, my Mom and brother, and then my brother and me. Family is very important to me, for those of you not yet aware of that. Though I grew up with "Orange", I never would have been able to get to the place I am without the love and support of my wonderful family.


When I was a child
With diabetes,
I grew to hate
The colour orange.
The sugar in my body
Needed testing.
Orange
Meant sugar,
Too much Sugar.

And now -
I envision lines,
And lines,
And lines,
In the record book,
Lines of orange.

As a child with Diabetes
What
Went through my mind
About these lines of orange
In the Record Book?
They were always present.

I probably did not even recognize
Any interspersal of beautiful blue,
Or calming green.
Striving For perfection?
Who Me?
Striving to erase all those lines,
Of orange,
Which could never
Be erased.
Striving to erase the lines
Of imperfection
Which would be
Forever
Part of me.

Today -
I can truly appreciate
The colour orange.
Now I understand
It represents joy.
I work towards Joy.
I strive for it.
I strive
For more imperfection.
The striving
Is not easy.

Forever will live in me -
Those lines and lines
Of the colour orange.



Thursday, photo day (for CaC) - OK, OK - I know it's Saturday but I just can't keep up here. AND I want SO MUCH, SO VERY,VERY MUCH, because I love the idea to make a spirit doll, BUT it may not happen for a few Sundays. What can I do? I am trying hugely to not stress so much, so maybe I just need to get things done when I can. Hmmm, maybe I can make today's project quickly, and have it done for next Saturday. It's a dream jar. I need one of those.


For photo Thursday I've taken a photo, or a couple, of something I treasure. It is this beautiful turquoise bowl which our niece, god-child, made for us for Christmas a couple of years ago. DH gave me what-not about the photo of the back. I had to. It's beautiful too and part of why I treasure this piece. It has TW's initials. I'm so proud that she has my name for her middle name. In some waays TW and I are very alike. In some ways we are very different. We both love blue and we are both artistic. She's frustrated that she doesn't have time now to be creative much but she's got a full time job as a prison guard and is also starting a new (reasonably) relationship. My prayers are with her especially on that. We love each other very much and are very good friends.

A message from my Mary Engelbreit calendar

Thursday, March 01, 2007


"getting to know you day" from CaC:

1a. What is one thing about your body that you hate, deny, talk trash about?

I think I’d have to say that I hate my shoulders. Not only are they ALWAYS way up by my ears, resulting in almost chronic shoulder pain, but they are kind of big and bony. My dream would be for them to be relaxed and sitting softly at my side so that I hardly notice them there at all. I actually experienced this a couple of times about six or seven years ago after I’d visited our naturopathic Dr. for the first time and he’d done some quantum treatment for stress. I imagined it was something like heaven. I wish I could return to that state.

1b. What can you do to make friends with this part and show it a little love?

I obviously need to try to relax more often, probably get more sleep on a regular basis and remember to laugh more and smile more and breathe more deeply - not so shallowly. I need to worry less. I need to be more gentle with myself. I could try to use the word “could” more often instead of the word “should”. Thanks to my friend Carol for that advice.

2a. What is one thing about your home that doesn't feel good?

It doesn’t feel good that there is so much clutter, nearly everywhere. It is particularly bad in the basement. Much of the clutter is in relation to the fact that I am trying to play in the area of mixed media and haven’t quite discovered in which specific area I want to concentrate. The fact that all three of us are collectors of stuff, doesn’t really help either.


2b. What is one thing you can do to change that?

I have had spurts of energy and blocks of time in which I have been able to do some major purge and organization. I’ve had garage sales in which I have made quite a lot of money through the sales. I know I can do more organization but will probably wait until the spring (may be another six weeks, but it WILL arrive) when I am feeling stronger and more cheery. I have one room in the basement almost cleared and ready to set up a bit of a studio. Yes! I know I can do it. I also have a bright shower curtain, from a second hand store, to hang in front of the closet (with no doors), an old green cupboard, and a huge table to go in the room. I know it will happen.


3a. Is there a relationship that you have difficulty with?

Right now the relationship with our daughter continues to be difficult. She is a teenager and also has difficulties with social skills because of challenges she has. The school and others have been working with her regarding the social skills but she went into a much larger school this year when she started high school. They are not as familiar with her and the program is not as specialized as it had been. Some of the things she has most difficulty with are understanding her own non-verbal communications and her tone of voice. She tends to come across as super critical of me. My own sensitivity allows for me to feel easily hurt.

3b. What is something small you can do to either salvage it or come to terms with the way it is now?

Methods of coping and accepting are on going. I could try to remember she is a teenager and emotions can flare regardless. I could try to build my own self-esteem and take more lightly her criticisms. I could try to be more positive with her and provide even more compliments, while trying to ask her opinion more often. We could try to have more fun with each other and laugh more often.

4a. Is there something you are afraid to do, but would like to try it?

I am afraid to try selling my art, to open an “etsy’ shop, even though I would really like to.4b. What can you do to begin a plan to try it? I can put together pictures of the items I do have. I can determine how much postage would cost. I can try to establish a bit more of an inventory. It would probably also help to join carfac and communicate with someone there about pricing and study their website to learn more about on-line business. I could review etsy to learn more about prices of similar items.

The photo is of me and our daughter "Cat".

Loving the idea of a spirit doll and hoping to have time to make one in next few days as suggested on CaC. In the meantime I checked my name from "quiz farm". I like Anastasia though it gave me the name Sylvia. I'm not certain that I could be called "truly a free spirit' but that is certainly what I would dream of - as obviously reflected in my results
You scored as Sylvia. Your name is Sylvia, and it means : Of The Woods, or Nature. You love to be outdoors, surrounded by creation and animals. Flowers are the sweetest perfume the world could know, and you love animals and plants. Your spirit is somewhat 'flower child' in the respect that you would rather spend time outdoors under the sky than anywhere else. You are truly a free spirit.

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